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  1. 02-17-2011, 01:17 AM #1
    CoddBrunson
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    Chuck Norris Facts

    Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

    Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

    Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
    Last edited by CoddBrunson; 02-17-2011 at 01:45 AM.
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  2. 02-17-2011, 01:19 AM #2
    pikeboy412
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    google: find chuck norris
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  3. 02-17-2011, 01:23 AM #3
    kamehameha3
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    lmfao , chuck norris is the sht tho. In the navy he's like god cuz i think he was a sailor back in the day
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  4. 02-17-2011, 01:27 AM #4
    pikeboy412
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    you cant find chuck norris, he finds you
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  5. 02-17-2011, 01:30 AM #5
    pikeboy412
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    chuck norris curbs stomps the pokerbot
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  6. 02-17-2011, 01:31 AM #6
    pikeboy412
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    Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried
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  7. 02-17-2011, 01:32 AM #7
    pikeboy412
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    Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
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  8. 02-17-2011, 01:33 AM #8
    pikeboy412
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    Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
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  9. 02-17-2011, 01:35 AM #9
    pikeboy412
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    Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

    They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.

    A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
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  10. 02-17-2011, 03:24 AM #10
    CoddBrunson
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    The bible was originally title Chuck Norris and Friends, but was deemed too unbelievable.

    Nails don't pierce Chuck Norris's skin, so it's a commonly known fact, Jesus was Chuck's stunt double.

    Jesus turned water into wine, Chuck Norris turned that wine into beer.

    Jesus once saw Chuck Norris in his tortilla.
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