Its not you...Its me...

[NeilZelkin]

After three years as an esteemed member of PokerOwned, I feel like I have been more of a taker than a giver from the PokerOwned community. During this time, I have taken lots and lots of poker chips from virtually everyone who calls PokerOwned home. Yet, the only time I can find time to return this generosity is when bad luck pays me its occasional visit. Bad luck is the only thing that keeps poker interesting because without it I would never lose. So in my book (Yet-to-be-released) it is God actually giving back some chips not me. I just take, take, take.

Who cares? You ask. I do because as time has gone on, I have come to learn that PO members are good god-fearing folk who deserve better than to have someone of my abundant skills work their magic and after a bluff here, a good read there, unceremoniously separate them from their stack. With each stack I take, each player I bust, unseen to all but me, my conscience makes another deposit at the 1st National Bank of Guilt. And as you would expect, after three straight years of non-stop success, the deposits have added up leaving me a bitter and broken man. I find myself cursing my otherworldly poker talent when most poker players would kill to have 1/10th of my natural ability. The sleepless nights wasted lying in bed next to my usual sleeping companions (two or three bikini models) pondering the plight of my overmatched peers and their disappearing poker chips when I should be doing what any normal guy would do in my shoes, treating my bunkmates to a slide on Neil?s wild ride.

My life, as it is now, is unmanageable. Spending $500 on bikini models so that they can watch me lie in the corner of my bed in the fetal position quietly whimpering like an infant. Spreading nothing but a feeling of loss and worthlessness to a group of people whose very foundation is community and self-improvement. I understand, my therapist understands and my general counsel understands that something needs to change or I am gonna end up losing my mind. Besides my morning masturbation, sanity is something that I treasure more than anything.

I need to start giving back to PokerOwned. It is that simple. So starting today, every time you sit next to me at a poker table just know that whenever my chips end up in your stack, it wasn?t skill or luck that brought them your way, it was ME!!! And my decision to save my sanity by giving back to a great group of adults who have spent the last 36 months generously giving to me.

thanks,

neil zelkin as told to Janish.

[TONelson]

Well ok then.

[shellabella]

I think I wouldn't mind sitting next to Neil..at a poker table. Do you play on Pokerstars?

[NeilZelkin]

No I am in the USA. Land of the Free Home of No Online Poker.

[rivdee]

The only thing that could have made this post better is if you used courier new and double line spaced it.

[Drywallman3]

I enjoy taking your llb's ............... go white sox

[s810car]

fk it shoulda used Wingdings font

[NeilZelkin]

LLB. And it was once and you had to come in first just to win. 8 3 off to win. The only joker in the deck is you.

I enjoy taking your llb's ............... go white sox

[DuckU408]

After three years as an esteemed member of PokerOwned, I feel like I have been more of a taker than a giver from the PokerOwned community. During this time, I have taken lots and lots of poker chips from virtually everyone who calls PokerOwned home. Yet, the only time I can find time to return this generosity is when bad luck pays me its occasional visit. Bad luck is the only thing that keeps poker interesting because without it I would never lose. So in my book (Yet-to-be-released) it is God actually giving back some chips not me. I just take, take, take.

Who cares? You ask. I do because as time has gone on, I have come to learn that PO members are good god-fearing folk who deserve better than to have someone of my abundant skills work their magic and after a bluff here, a good read there, unceremoniously separate them from their stack. With each stack I take, each player I bust, unseen to all but me, my conscience makes another deposit at the 1st National Bank of Guilt. And as you would expect, after three straight years of non-stop success, the deposits have added up leaving me a bitter and broken man. I find myself cursing my otherworldly poker talent when most poker players would kill to have 1/10th of my natural ability. The sleepless nights wasted lying in bed next to my usual sleeping companions (two or three bikini models) pondering the plight of my overmatched peers and their disappearing poker chips when I should be doing what any normal guy would do in my shoes, treating my bunkmates to a slide on Neil?s wild ride.

My life, as it is now, is unmanageable. Spending $500 on bikini models so that they can watch me lie in the corner of my bed in the fetal position quietly whimpering like an infant. Spreading nothing but a feeling of loss and worthlessness to a group of people whose very foundation is community and self-improvement. I understand, my therapist understands and my general counsel understands that something needs to change or I am gonna end up losing my mind. Besides my morning masturbation, sanity is something that I treasure more than anything.

I need to start giving back to PokerOwned. It is that simple. So starting today, every time you sit next to me at a poker table just know that whenever my chips end up in your stack, it wasn?t skill or luck that brought them your way, it was ME!!! And my decision to save my sanity by giving back to a great group of adults who have spent the last 36 months generously giving to me.

thanks,

neil zelkin as told to Janish.

how about try to contribute to the website and go do some survey and task.

[NeilZelkin]

how about try to contribute to the website and go do some survey and task.

How about go try and get a golden donkey. Oh wait, u have 84 of them. My bad. Should be renamed the Golden Duck. BTW I have earned over a quarter million points in my time here. So I have put in the work.